I’ve got this annoying, almost strangulating, knot in my throat as a result of holding back my tears. I’m sick of the self-pity, so I’m doing all I can not to give in to it. Whining around all the time “Poor me” is pathetic. But, hey, we all do it. Not all to the same degree; but, nevertheless, we’re all self-absorbed.
In less than 24 hours, I’ve read and watched material pertaining to life, happiness, purpose, etc. I wasn’t out seeking this information. It all just conveniently fell onto my lap as I was scrolling through my Reader on WordPress (the reading portion that is). The first one I just rolled my eyes. Take no offense, Digital Catharsis. It’s me, not you. The second post I couldn’t get past #1. I actually read the whole post, but I don’t have a bloody clue as to my “calling”. The third one was just a punch in the face after reading the second. Click on the links I provided. It’ll take you 5 minutes max to read all 3. So to top off my night, I decided to watch 2 of Oprah’s Lifeclass episodes that I have had recorded for several months now. Did you know that Rick Warren‘s book “The Purpose Driven Life” is the 2nd best hard cover seller next to the Bible? That’s an incredible achievement!
The tips provided in all these resources sound simple and practical, but they’re not a “one size fits all”. Don’t get me wrong. The advice is great. However, if finding one’s calling was that easy then Rick Warren wouldn’t have a #2 best seller. There are too many people out there just like myself that are confused. There are things that I may be good at, but don’t particularly like and vice versa. I have a broad spectrum of interests, but nothing I couldn’t live without. I can do many things “well”, but I’m not “great” at any one thing. I can’t afford to continue taking out student loans to try different professions to find out if it’s a fit for me.
I’ve thought this through earnestly and for a very long time. I thought possibly I’d make a good Counselor because I can relate and connect to people on many different levels. Honestly, I don’t want to have to relive my past every time I help somebody–not as a profession anyway. I will always help anyone I can whenever I can. There are countless other things I’ve considered and dismissed for good reason.
Most recently I began thinking that perhaps I wasn’t created to be something/someone great and extraordinary. Maybe I’m just a stepping stone. Maybe my whole purpose is just to lift others up to do great things. I’m always there to help others realize their potential–and believe it. I can see in others what they don’t see. I want everybody to be happy and pursue their hearts desires. A cheerleader, I guess.
I was getting ready to say that I’ve never had anyone do that for me, but was very quickly reminded of someone who holds a special place in my heart. I had this one teacher that believed in me. She stopped me from going to vocational school because she told me I was “college material”. That woman was there for me more than she will ever know. Great! Now I’m crying and can no longer write. I’m sure you all get my point. Or, maybe not.