Bishop T. D. Jakes posed the question recently on social media: “If you could do anything and not fail, what would it be?”. I’m not sure if he was looking for answers like “To go to heaven”, “To be a Saint”, “To be an Evangelist”; but, without giving a second thought my answer was “To be a doctor”. As crazy as it may seem, I’ve wanted to become a doctor since the age of four and that desire has never changed. What has changed is my perspective.
I married very young (for reasons I don’t regret) and immediately started a family. So at the beginning of my adult life I had self-imposed limitations. I didn’t realize the restrictions I had placed on my life would bring me to where I am today–Mid-Life Crises! I have continually battled settling for less than I am. I can give every logical excuse in the world for my decisions, but the fact of the matter is, I will never be happy seeking to be something/someone who I’m not. This is where the title of this post comes in to play.
I’ve had numerous people say this to me over the past few years and the most recent was just yesterday. I was at a family reunion and my grandmother said to me, in front of others mind you, “I wish you’d just pick something and stick with it”. I’ll admit, it pissed me off! There’s nothing worse than being critiqued by others when all the while you’ve been your own worst critic. I just want to scream to the world with every fiber of my being that I am NOT complacent, I still have an abundance of potential, and all I need is S-O-M-E-O-N-E THAT C-A-R-E-S ENOUGH TO H-E-L-P!!! I am beyond the prideful stage of striving to be so independent that I wouldn’t dare ask or accept help. Been there, done that, learned from it. Everybody needs help now and then and there’s no shame in admitting it or asking for it. The problem now lies with compassion of humanity… or lack there of.
Just to be clear, I am not asking for handouts or expecting someone to come in and do everything for me. When I speak of needing help in different areas of my life, I mean help in the truest sense of the word.